Here is a public facebook link to my Denver photos:
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2017082&id=1183500282&l=fc294d231c
1 Thessalonians 2:8 "We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well, because you had become so dear to us."
Last Thursday I got back to my room, sat down on my bed, and reflected on all that I had accomplished in my work day: I made homemade brownies for the house, played Guess Who with a couple of the Treasure House kids, sat with various women on the back porch while they smoked, learned about the terrors of nursing newborns from a resident while we were in the waiting room of a doctor's office, went to Jamba Juice with a resident, set the table and ate dinner with everyone, folded newsletters, and watched Lars and the Real Girl with whoever felt so inclined.
I caught myself feeling a little pathetic. Really Hannah? You played games and ate food? What kind of work is that?
But I'm realizing that this is exactly where God is leading me. This is incarnational ministry. It seems so contrary to what I expected out of an internship. I came to Denver ready to conquer the world, eliminate poverty, and give homes to every single homeless person with whom I came into contact. But sometimes, we are called to just sit with someone. When we are honest that we don't have all the answers, we can move into spirituality instead of judgment. We can simply be among and be present. I'm so used to existing as a human doing...checking off a three page post-it note to do list. But this summer, I am learning to become a human being. I am learning to simply be, instead of do. I'm learning to sit with people and not just share the Gospel with them, but my life as well because they are so dear to me.
I'm learning how to take care of my soul. When our lives are only filled with chaos and irritation, we only bring more chaos to those whose lives are already chaotic. But, when we take the time to care for ourselves, we can be filled, rested, and the fruits of the spirit will flow from us. This summer, we have been practicing several spiritual exercises. My favorite has been an artist date. Each week, I take a date with my soul, doing something that my soul needs. From taking care of myself, I find myself more patient, available to listen, and open to divine interruptions. Today...my artist date is sitting in the Ink! coffee house on 16th Street Mall. It has been a beautiful morning to catch up on emails, listen to music, people watch, and drink coffee.
We have also been practicing an Ignatian spiritual exercise called the examination of conscience. At the end of the day, before I go to sleep, I try and do these things.
1. To get quiet and give thanks to God for everything he has given to me.
2. To ask for grace to know during the course of my day when I have been close to God, moving toward him and where I have felt distant and moved away.
3. Examine my thoughts, words, and deeds during each hour of my day - where have I moved towards God and where have I moved away from him?
4. Have a resolution for tomorrow to move closer to God and ask for his help in doing so
From practicing this exercise, it has blessed me and given me time to quiet myself before the Lord and reflect on my day. It has helped me recognize my own humanity - humbling myself and knowing that I cannot move towards God without his grace and help.
Blessings and love to you all.
