I had the honor of enjoying a few banquet table days with God, instead of the usual 7-11 God time that most days consist of. We traveled a couple hours north of Denver to an elevation of 10,000ish feet. We stayed at a beautiful little cabin in the woods with no electricity or running water and a wood-burning stove. Oh my, do pancakes ever taste good when they're made over a wood-burning stove :)
One of our days was spent in silence and solitude. In his book, Beloved, Henri Nouwen writes, "Solitude is essential if you want to live a life that is not destructive. If you want to accept your aloneness in a way that it becomes creative and not destructive, solitude is a way to embrace, to befriend your aloneness as a positive gift." I've never understood my need to be alone, to quiet myself and listen to the Lord. But after experiencing so many mornings at a coffee house with a latte, Bible, and journal, or walking around the mountains, listening to the leaves clap in the wind, or putting my feet in a cold river running down from a waterfall, my soul is so much more alive, rested, and at peace.
17 more days...It's weird to be on the downside of the mountain...having the bottom closer than the top. It's crazy to think that I'll be back in Cedar Rapids so soon. In looking at the coming months and years ahead, God has placed these words on my heart: "Don't be afraid, it is I. The time has not yet come until now." As I look at all the changes in front of me, I have the tendency to freak out, get anxious, and be completely overwhelmed. Just as the disciples were terrified when they saw a shadowy figure walking towards them on the water, I too get terrified at what seems uncertain and scary. But that figure on the water was Christ. The change and uncertainty in my life is Christ. Part of my selfish motive in coming to Denver for the summer was to perhaps find my vocation in life :) I kind of expected to jump into an internship that was exactly what God wanted me to do for the rest of my life. That didn't really happen, but I think that I'm slowly learning to release my expectations and desires to God, trusting that He is the God who is present in uncertainty.
Up...
I went and saw "Up" the other day. If you haven't seen it, you should. It was the most beautiful and moving Pixar film I've ever seen :)
That's all. Blessings.
